Let's have a little sick and twisted fun (what better kind is there???)

UPDATE: Okay, I put the actual words on. Too bad we couldn't have had a little more response. But the ones who DID got them right! Pat yourself on the back!
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I have a strange family and I think the rest of the world is beginning to figure it out because of this blog.

One of the things that my family is really good at (bad at???) is making up lyrics for songs. You know replacing what is there with something so stupid or so raunchy you can't help but laugh. Basically it has ruined some songs for me because when I hear the song, all I can think of is the way the lyrics have been butchered, abused and left to die on the side of the road by Rat Man or The Tomboy!

I am going to post some of them, but just for fun (or sadism) I am going to post them and see if any of you can guess what the song actually was. Some of them will be very, very simple and obvious, but some of them won't. Some of them are old 70s or 80s songs, some of them may be newer and they can come from any genre (country, rock, alternative, etc. etc.).

Okay, just leave a comment if you think you know what a certain song is; or certain songs are, you can guess more than one. Answer as many of them as you can figure out. I will post at the beginning of next week a list of what the songs really were and who the artist is that sings it. Some of these will be actual song titles, some of them will be lines from within the song. WARNING! Some of them are GRAPHIC, so like I always say, if you are easily offended you are in the wrong place dumbass, click that little "x' at the top of your screen or you will be scarred for life please leave now.

I will give you a hint with each line to make it easier. (See how sweet I am?)


1. "Eighteen wheels and a dozen donuts" (Country Song, circa 1980s)

Actual Words: Eighteen Wheels and a Dozen Roses- by Country Singer Kathy Matea

2. "Smack you in the butt with a spatula" (Think "Zombie")

Actual Words: I slam in the back of my Dragula - by Rob Zombie

3. "Put your weenie in my bottom" (Think "Genies" and then feel ashamed of yourself for snickering!)

Actual Words: "I'm a Genie in a Bottle"- by Christina Aguilera

4. "I see a fat whore and I want to shave her back." (Think "Black" thoughts.)

Actual Words: "I see a red door and I want it to be black"- by The Rolling Stones

5. "Donuts make my brown eyes blue." (Kinda obvious if you grew up listening to country music in the 1970s)

Actual Words: Don't it make my brown eyes blue-by Country Singer Crystal Gayle

6. "I kinda always knew I'd end up your mom's girlfriend" (No hint on that one; too easy.)

Actual Words: I kinda always knew I'd end up your EX Girlfriend- by the band No Doubt

Side Note: The Tomboy goes around inserting the words "your mom" into EVERYTHING and it can be so HILARIOUS! Think about THAT the next time you are listening to one of your favorite songs. Try it with movie titles; you will be peeing your pants. Yeah, it’s immature, but it is sooo much FUN!

7. "Hump the bodies in the morgue" (Think about “Drowning”)

Actual Words: Let the bodies hit the floor-by Drowning Pool (I'm ashamed to admit I actually came up with that one. See Rat Man and The Tomboy are rubbing off on me!)

8. "Because, I had a time with your wife." (Think about it, Baby)

Actual Words: "Because I had the time of my life"-by Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes "The Dirty Dancing Soundtrack"

Okay, so what songs do you think these completely twisted sentences above were derived from? Sorry, no prizes or anything, but you can feel smart for a day or two if you get more of them right than anyone else! Isn't that reward enough?

Have fun;o)



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